This moment, today, right now is a very good day.  I say that as if it is important because it is. Today I feel great.  It is difficult to explain to people how you never know what a day will hold until you are in the midst of it and even then things can change.  This is why this disease is so very frustrating.  It is difficult to make plans too far in advance because you never know.  A storm brewing could give me a headache which makes me weaker which means. .  . you get the idea. A small problem to most people can be quality of life threatening to me.  And how do you explain to people something they have never experienced.  It is like a sighted person explaining the colour yellow to someone who has never had sight.

If we lie to ourselves about our situation then we cannot expect anyone else to help us.  If we deny the reality of our circumstances then we will remain frozen in a rut of our own making.  We must face the truth of our disability and accept the facts.  I have multiple sclerosis. I have a disability. Those are the facts.  Now what comes after that is open for discussion.  Will I walk again?    Not today.   Tomorrow, probably not.  That does not mean that I am 100% convinced that I will never walk again.  I may not.  On the other hand they may find a cure and I will be doing the polka by Christmas.  In some ways that is a VERY scary thought.  Me doing the polka?  As for the walking part . . . stranger things have happened.  I do not spend my time worrying about walking.  I do not spend my time waiting for a cure.  I live in the here and now but I can still dream can’t I?  January 2002 my doctors wanted me to accept that it was all over except for the breathing.  I want to live; I want to have a life.  And I do.  It is not the same as it once was but I will not go quietly into an institution to simply exist.  I will fight tooth and nail for the right to fail, to make mistakes, to live.  You see that is the only way I can remain true to myself, to the person I have become.  Life is not easy, nor is it impossible.  That is the challenge, to make it work.  I ask for help when I need it and I do what I can.  I will do what I can for as long as I can and then I will once again adapt.  That is the wondrous thing about the lowly Homo sapiens, the ability to adapt.