Curiosity is the first step towards understanding.
Think about it. ‘Isms’ have thousands if not millions who believe in them. Everyone knows at least a couple of witticisms. Some people believe them so much they live their life according to their wisdom. Volunteerism is regarded throughout the world as one of the better things human beings do. Millions of people love ventriloquism and so many are very much into vegetarianism.
There is tourism and synergism, survivalism and cannibalism. Oh, wait, not that one! Here’s a good one: heroism! Yes, that’s better. Whew! How about absurdism or activism? Altruism and realism. Yes I want to be an ‘ism’. My daily quips could become Qu-isms! Isn’t that kind of cool? Cosmopolitanism or Cubism, eroticism, antidisestablishmentarianism. Now that’s a mouthful!
While I was wandering around looking up ideas for ‘ism’ I discovered that there are a lot of fun silly words that use that suffix. I also discovered some not nice even heinous, horrible words. Like plagiarism or narcissism or racism and terrorism. These are definitely words I do not want to have any contact with. As horrible as these issues are we must never dismissed them. They are part of our everyday lives. We must work within ourselves and in our communities to eradicate the negative isms. But that doesn’t mean we have to stop having a little fun. So I still think I want to be an ‘ism’. Wouldn’t you?
A silly little bird
Is flitting round my brain
I fear it may do damage
My memories it may drain
But wait a bit I’ve got it wrong
So typical of me
The silly tit’s a song
And he’s singing just for thee
The words go back and then go forth
Just like a bird in flight
I hear the tune so clearly now
My memories they are tight
I love the song this birdie sings
A gentle misty tune
If only all could hear his song
Of peace and love and soon
This moment, today, right now is a very good day. I say that as if it is important because it is. I have been feeling somewhat less than wonderful for the last few weeks and today I feel great. It is difficult to explain to people how you never know what a day will hold until you are in the midst of it and even then things can change. When you have an itty, bitty incurable disease it is difficult to make plans too far in advance. You never know how you will feel in advance. A storm brewing could give me a headache which makes me weaker, which means. . . you get the idea. A small problem to most people can be quality of life threatening to me. And how do you explain to people something they have never experienced. It is like a sighted person explaining the colour yellow to someone who has never had sight.
Demons, we all have them. They are in our dreams where we are vulnerable; they are in our subconscious where they second guess our decisions. Demons are real and they live in each of us. Demons on TV are usually defeated by strength and determination. We live in the real world and our demons are undermining our determination each and every day. Controlling my demons is definitely a priority on my list.
The first step is to rid yourself of any negativity around you. If you have people near you who only see your faults, politely ask them, no tell them, to take a hike. Having a disability is hard enough without someone else telling you that you are going to fail. I know I occasionally need to be told I am doing the right thing by not giving in. I need to know that my family and friends are in my corner. I couldn’t do it without them. I am lucky there, incredibly lucky. No my demons are internal. I second guess myself; I question whether or not I am right. Is this book good enough? Will people like me for me? I guess in so many ways I am my own worst enemy. It is hard for me to believe that what I have to say will be of interest to another. It is difficult for me to believe that I am good enough, or smart enough, or pretty enough. You see what I mean? I am always afraid that I will take more than my share or that which I am not entitled to, so I often take less than I should. I am afraid of another’s perception. It is not enough to do what is right, it is also important to be perceived as doing what is right. Sometimes it is difficult to convince myself that I am doing what I should. BUT DAMN IT I AM CUTE!