Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day

I always hoped I could sneak by this holiday with nobody noticing. Like that is ever going to happen! I believe in true love. I witnessed this. My parents were married for 58 years and they were perhaps the best example I’ve ever seen of a true partnership. They completed each other. They weren’t perfect but in comparison to what I see these days, they were pretty darn close .

I am not a fan of the expectations on a day like today. If you are single, people look at you as if you are odd or to be pitied. And yet I look at couples and I wonder why they’re together.  Some are obviously a good fit but others seemed to feed animosity in each other.  I would rather be single and happy then miserable in a relationship. I have been both.

Artificial Holidays are created by marketing gurus to make money. It works. A great deal of money is spent on Valentine’s Day. People are almost shamed into spending money on things other people don’t really need. And no, I’m not talking about the chocolate. People always need chocolate! But I have been there buying the special outfit for the special dinner on the special day. Money is spent on nails and hair and shoes just so we can be seen as participating on this made-up holiday. If you love someone you should show it every single day. Not with grand gestures or over the top proclamations but with small gestures. Perhaps taking out the garbage before you’re asked or bringing home a single flower for absolutely no reason at all.

According to Wikipedia:

The Feast of Saint Valentine was established by Pope Gelasius I in AD 496 to be celebrated on February 14 in honour of Saint Valentine of Rome, who died on that date in AD 269.

He was a clergyman who believed in love and compassion and doing what he could for others. That is something to be celebrated every day. But society does love its extravagances. And so, we have Valentine’s Day. I wonder if anybody remembers St Valentine who was martyred for giving care to persecuted Christians?

Over time, holidays change. What used to be a simple declaration of love from one to another now requires a spectacle. It’s as if we try desperately to outdo each other in how big our declaration can be. And the winners in all of this? The stores. That is my problem with Valentine’s Day. And it is my problem.  If it pleases you then by all means enjoy everything Valentine’s Day has to offer. And may love grow everywhere.


39 thoughts on “Valentine’s Day

  1. Dan Antion

    I’ve been in the “this is a big deal, you better get it right” relationship and the “no big deal, thanks for doing the dishes” kind. I’ve been in the latter for almost 38 years. No pressure.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. Murphy's Law

    Boy Howdy! You summed it up perfectly. When we were first married, my husband and I went the “over-the-top” route. Why? Because that was what was expected. No matter who I spoke to, in person or over the phone, the first thing our of their mouth was, “WHAT DID YOU GET FOR VALENTINES DAY?”

    This year will mark 60 years of marriage and 55 years of a hug and a kiss on Valentine’s Day. More than adequate.

    Very sad that so many of us have to have lavish displays of gifts to feel loved or to show our love for someone. Or that we use “things” to express our feelings for someone. But, to each his own.

    And yes, we always need chocolate!! Every day! 🤗

    PS: I love that your roses aren’t red!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. quiall Post author

      Ha ha ha. Thanks Ginger. It sounds like you have the kind of partnership my parents had. They loved each other, they liked each other and they were each other’s best friend. That was special to witness.


  3. John Hric

    Well I guess that means there will not be a sequel about how the grinch stole Valentines day too ! I was so looking forward staying in this week and watching the movie. And not taking the garbage out until it warms up a bit in a week and a half.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. delphini510

    I really enjoyed reading your post, Pam. You talk about your parents who were ‘ darn near perfect’. I like this expression and grew up with parents that live up to this too. A strong base for a child.
    As to Valentine’s I thank you for info, I didn’t know the whole story. In Sweden there is today
    what translated would be ‘ Alla hjärtans dag’ = All hearts day. That doesn’t mean that Valentines doesn’t exist. Wouldn’t it be grand if each day was one way or the other a Valentine’s Day. Giving of love in the daily life.


    Liked by 1 person

  5. John W. Howell

    Good post, Pamela. We consider Valentine’s Day as one we don’t need to celebrate. (and don’t) Gotta feel sorry for those folks who feel they need to go out of their way to express love for each other. Seems so hollow. Having said that a hug to you on Valentine’s day. 🤗

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Sun Hesper Jansen

    I’m with you! Performative romance is always silly, but in the service of capitalism it just feels wrong. Also, it’s stressful for the retailers! I like to give sweets randomly throughout the year and I think my favorite local chocolatier appreciates that. ^_^

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Mark Lanesbury

    Dear lady, your priorities are exactly where they should be…chocolate, chocolate, chocolate 😂 🤣
    But besides that, you are correct in it being the individuals thoughts everyday, only then will you truly feel that gift of truth from another 😀

    Liked by 1 person


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