I don’t lie. That is not an arrogant statement of superiority. I’m simply not very good at it. My coworkers used to laugh when I told a lie. Everybody knew I was lying. So why bother trying? What I was good at, was obfuscation and misdirection. Damn, I’m good at that! And that is not an arrogant statement of superiority. It is simply my means of getting around things I am uncomfortable with.
A friend had just come back from spending an obscene amount of money at a salon for a new haircut. She was obviously very pleased with it and asked me what I thought. Now I care very deeply for this friend and I would never do anything that would cause her any kind of pain. Unfortunately, I was not in a position to keep my mouth shut because I had been asked a direct question. So, I answered in the most indirect manner I could. I simply told her that it was an incredible look. I didn’t say it was an incredibly good look. She looked like her hair had been cut by an eight-year-old with dull scissors high on crack cocaine. I’m not kidding. And I wasn’t lying. It happened many years ago and we laugh about it now. She did eventually see the humour.
Politicians are known for their lies and it is expected by everyone. I find that difficult to understand. I don’t like being lied to. Especially when it’s done openly and everybody knows it’s a lie! And yet it seems to be the way we live our lives. We expect those around us to lie to us. I’m one of those naïve people that expects others to tell me the truth. I don’t know why am surprised when I find out they haven’t. But I am. Look at advertising. Now these people are good. They lie so well you don’t know it’s happening. Case in point…
A very large chain that sells hamburgers recently laid the claim that their beef is grass fed. I won’t use their name because that would be unkind. But here’s my question: what were they fed before? They haven’t told a lie. But they’ve taken a statement of truth and elevated it to gospel. I see cows in the fields all the time and their faces are in the, oh I don’t know, grass! Cows have been eating grass since they crawled out of the primordial slime several million years ago. And the methane which is produced from that grass is one of the contributors to global warming. I’m just saying.
Words are wonderful to wander through, to play with, to communicate. But they can also be used to confuse, to manipulate and to harm. We all need to watch what we say but sometimes the mistakes that we inadvertently speak are the basis of some of our best humour. And we all need a good laugh. Especially these days. So please, accept my words in the spirit in which they are given and enjoy.
We’re cut from the same cloth Pam. I couldn’t pull a lie off if you put a gun to my head! I swear, something must light up on my forehead if I’m lying. That’s a good thing though. The people I know who are chronic liars are as addicted to it as others are to cocaine.
Unless you really want my honest opinion about something, don’t ask me. Sometimes if I’m asked a direct question, and my honest answer will be hurtful to you, I try to go down the middle of the road and soften the edges…..not the exact truth, not really a lie.
Lies are so unreliable. You need an incredible memory bank. The truth is a fact. Plain and simple. The truth doesn’t change every time the wind blows. It brings stability to our lives and gives us confidence.
Ginger
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I should write a post on the truth. I find the truth changes depending on your perspective. But I guess that’s why we like each other so much, we are so much alike.
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I also don’t like lying and I can’t stand that politicians do it all the time and get away with it. I am also very poor at it so I try to stay out of situations where I might have to speak to a slight mistruth or sidetrack someone so I don’t have to say what I think. Unfortunately, I also tend to blurt things out. That’s gotten me into a situation or twelve.
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“That’s gotten me into a situation or twelve.” I laughed out loud Emilie. I so resemble that remark. Somewhere in my aging process I have lost my filter. Whoops!!
Ginger
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I think filters are overrated. And it’s fun with getting away with it!
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Oh, me too! I love words but they get me into so much trouble trying to stay out of trouble.
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I loved that piece Pamela! I too do not lie well…Some words are definitely better left unsaid…
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Simple words have such incredible power.
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I think it’s a very sad statement, albeit true, that we expect politicians to lie to us. It is what they do and they don’t even really do it well. And they think nothing of telling us something today and telling someone else the exact opposite tomorrow. And then they’ll tell us they never said either thing despite the fact that there’s proof. And then they question the motivation of the person with the proof.
Sorry, I ranted a bit.
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Dan you are saying what we all know. You can rant on my blog anytime you want. You make sense when you rant.
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Thank you.
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H’mm lets see – cows. Cows are in the fields but commercial farming usually involves feeding them more than grass, including grains, steroids, hay all kinds of stuff. So “grass fed” means that’s all they had, which organic or natural farming like to use. It is actually better for us, and I suspect what God intended when he made them. Don’t get me started on politics! Well just this little bit – what I see here in the US is the far right being so lost in lies and conspiracies I don’t think they will ever find their way out of the quicksand. They fight and sink deeper and deeper every day. OK that’s all I have…..sort of.
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Polite rants are always welcome here! And I don’t know what else they’re feeding those cows but I don’t trust them to be telling us the truth.
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I understand!
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For some, lies roll off their tongues so easily, they actually believe themselves.
If I am asked to give my opinion and I know it will hurt, I will do as you did and give it an adjective that leaves open for interpretation… Though most people understand “interesting” to mean ‘I don’t know how to tell you without hurting you…” it still comes of as less hurtful, I hope!
Politicians seem to have been given permission to lie. An awful thing!
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I will admit that I often cuddle up with my thesaurus to help me in my woes.
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Yes! That is a great thing to do 🙂 Kindred spirits, are we.
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I’m with you on lies. I don’t understand why they are necessary. Grass feed means they don’t get grain and hence are less fat. I’m sure the burger chain grinds the whole cow so what the grass-fed claim means is uncertain. There is nothing healthy about a hamburger.
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Very true. And yet millions are consumed every day
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That is the amazing part of finding ourselves, as we do our integrity from loving ourselves it asks us to be that love and stand in our truth. So the lies and wobbly bits get less and less until we can, kindly and lovingly, tell a truth so that it isn’t hurting as badly as say a politician with their obvious intent to manipulate.
And that is why we don’t like them, those actions couldn’t be further from love if you tried. They are in fact hating us in what they do. If they only knew, in the end, just how isolated they are when it is all over and they get thrown onto the scrap heap. Yes they have a great house, big cars etc…but not one of their friends is true and their lives are filled with those unloving, manipulative, unloving lonely lies. Like attracts like.
As for me…I once was addicted to chocolate………. 🤥 🙄 🥴 😧 😮 😚 😂 🤣
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Chocolate was once a gift from the gods and I have no problem being addicted to a God product.
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I think everyone has said it for me…Great post and comments…The truth will always out!
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I always appreciate your voice Carol.
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Awww..that’s such a lovely comment 🙂 x
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The truth be told, this post is gold! 🤗🤍♥️💜
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The words you say, just made my day!
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I love it!! ♥️💚🤗
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People tell me I’m honest to a fault and, frankly, I’m not good at lying either. I may have gotten away with a few white lies in my life – “that dress is stunning on you (but not really)” – but I must tell the truth when it counts. I once put money in a candy bar machine after it spit out two candy bars instead of one and I caught flack from some co-workers for being too honest, but I slept in good conscience that night. Dishonesty is the same as lying. I also hate it when other people lie to me. Give me the truth because your lie will eventually come back to bite you and you will lose me as a trusting friend.
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I feel as you do! I sleep well knowing that my conscious is clear. If I have been in the wrong, I will admit it, if I get more than I am due I’ll give it back. It makes me feel good about who I am.
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You handled that situation with your friend rather deftly. And you’re right about the burgers!
As for obfuscation, that word goes in my Melville Files!
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I like it almost as much as prestidigitation.
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Boom! Pam strikes again.
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Great, provocative topic. A lie is a lie is a lie…unless it’s a white lie to protect someone’s feelings? There’s fine line between an outright lie used to persuade someone of something that is utterly false (or a hair’s breadth from that) and the white lie that skirts the absolute truth without exactly saying anything false either. I try hard to be honest…but I’m not always as astute as you in padding my truths to they don’t hurt. It’s a critical skill.
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It isn’t always easy, especially if someone knows me well. They often know what to look for. But it is a skill I am proud of. I do hate to cause dismay in others.
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