Fear is a great equalizer. We all feel it. The level at which we feel it and for what, does differ. And it’s not all negative. Fear keeps us from doing stupid things like jumping off a cliff just to see what happens. Fear is also a great motivator. We want to do well so we work towards our goals. But fear can also be debilitating. Far too often we are crippled by our fears.
I have many fears. The most unbearable one I have is the fear of snakes. I have not seen one in decades because I live in a city where they are incredibly uncommon. But I spent my youth camping. And let me tell you, that is their world! When I look back at that time it is with amusement. I can recall the incidences when I was in the presence of one of those . . . animals and from this great distance I can laugh at it. But at the time there was an incredible rush of adrenaline. My mind stopped processing images and words coherently and I would enter a state of panic. It was blind terror. And there was no reason for it. I’ve never had a bad incident or a childhood trauma. It was just there.
I used to be afraid to draw attention to myself, to look like an idiot. Well, that ship has sailed. But I’m having way too much fun to be worried about it. As I have aged, matured (stop snickering!) the power of that fear has lessened. I have accepted that some people won’t see me the way I see myself. I may even irritate some people. I don’t care. I would rather not of course but I’m not going to spend my life worrying or being afraid that someone won’t like me. Their issues are theirs not mine. I think that’s being quite mature!
Fear is something we share with the animal world. Have you ever seen a dog or cat that is afraid of loud noises or thunderstorms? Yes, I have too. It is not a pretty sight. And we all deal with our fears in different ways. Some approach it openly and others shy away. What is important is that we do deal with it. When we refuse to acknowledge our fears, we enter into a whole new realm of issues. Issues that may remain until we deal with it. This last two years has proven to many of us how deep those fears can run. We have learned to deal with a whole new reality and that is terrifying. Some have risen to the challenge others have needed a little help, there is no shame in asking for it. And we all need a little help now and then. All we have to do is say please…
Butterfly Sand 
Your fear of snakes is like my fear of rodents. Horrible. Terrifying. I can´t even look at a picture. But my worst fear, after those animals, has always been of a nuclear war. Let´s hope and pray my fears will not materialize.
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Hopefully our collective fear will force us to do the right thing.
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Recognizing and assessing our fears has always been important, Pam, but I think the past two years have given them the upper hand. We have to work harder to control our lives on our terms. Thanks for a thoughtful look at a difficult subject.
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I think fear loses some of its potency when it is shared. It does for me.
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Thanks, Pam. It rang a few bells. This is such a common one, I think. I don’t like the idea of snakes – silently slithering towards me – but when in the Bahamas years ago, I touched one held by a professional snake handler, and didn ‘t freak out, but still don’t like the thought of it…Ugh. But not all phobias are as easy to conquer; claustrophobia for one…Hey ho. xx
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I touched one once that was held by professional and I shook for three days.
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Good thoughts because everyone has them. It’s part of being human. Thanks for giving me an idea for a beach walk topic that is not on my list.
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You inspire me so much I’m glad to return the favour.
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Yes, there’s no shame in asking for help. My fear is bats, and that’s from childhood trauma (more than once) of waking up to a bat flying around my bedroom at night. Well Jennie, when you leave the garage door open…
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Logic has never done much to quell my fears.
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Same here. You can tell me a gazillion times about bats, and it will do no good. I’m sure all those words about snakes were useless to you.
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Fear of snakes is in my top 5 fears. I’ve never had any experience with one, good or bad. These past two years have been very fearful, probably for most of us. It does make it easier when I know someone else shares the same fear. So far my fears, and I have many, aren’t controlling my life totally.
This is a very thought provoking post today.
Ginger
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I think the last two years has sharpened our response to fear. There seems to be so much of it so close.
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my fears are clowns and dentists, luckily I don’t have to spend much time with clowns and I’ve found a gentle dentist
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I’ve never had a problem with clowns until Hollywood stepped in. Now I can’t stand to look at even a nice one.
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Yep, me too.
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I enjoy your writing, Pam. There’s such wisdom! Fear does a better job as I get older at keeping me safer. Like Beth, I was terrified of clowns as a child. I used to fear failure but I got so good at it and learned so much that it’s my friend!
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I think fear is a valuable companion. As long as we don’t give it power over us. Thanks so much for your kind words Karla.
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You’re welcome-so true on not giving it power! Great!
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Great post, Pamela. I have always found my fears to be greatly exaggerated. Well, except for the time I was chased by a crocodile that is.
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I am never fooled by crocodile smiles… Or their tears either!
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I actually hit a drive on a Florida golf course that landed near a croc. My team mates wouldn’t let me take a stroke and said I had to hit it. The croc got very upset when I approached. To hit the ball I had to turn my back on him. He did not like that at all. My team died laughing as he lunged for me and I ran screaming. I did make it on the green though.
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Oh John, what a way to try to improve your chip shot 😂 🤣
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OH MY WORD! My father always said that golfers were tough.
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Nice quote.
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Thanks.
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Excellent post, Pam. Food for thought, that’s for sure. Has me thinking about what my fears – real fears – are. I used to fear looking foolish (maturity – don’t you laugh either!) has dimmed that one somewhat, though not completely.
These past two years have taught us how much we fear what is outside of our control, I’m thinking.
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You are absolutely right Dale. My own fears seem so trivial now with what is going on in the world.
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All in perspective. The world is hurting.
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A follow-on thought from the mention in the comments about the last two years … they’ve really brought home to me that we have no control over the actions of others.
Not us, little fish, here at the bottom of the foodchain. All we can do is look after our Selves and those close to us. Yes, if enough of us can get together we can move the needle a little bit, but the sheer breathtaking WEIGHT of it all maintains its own momentum.
Which isn’t to say there aren’t pools of beauty rippling between us, those of us who keep our hearts open but aware, and those pools always give me hope. The momentum will shift. After all, Mother Nature never travels in a straight line. 🙂
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I agree with you. Having no control or little control over the last few years has been overwhelming. I will admit to hiding away and becoming far too comfortable with my hermit self. But there has been such tenderness and beauty within all the madness that leaves me with hope.
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