Tag Archives: humour

Rattling

 

 

Have you ever had a poem,

Rattling round your head?

The moment that you write it down,

Damn! That puppy’s dead!

 

You hear the words internally,

The rhyming is so fine.

But when it’s on the paper,

It’s just a bloody crime!

 

My silly brain is addled

I can’t forget your face.

Or am I just remembering

Another in your place?

 

Life is such a crazy thing,

We live from day to day.

Writing is really what I do

For me to have my say!

 

Now I wrestle with my words.

I’ll make that poem work!

If I don’t then I’ll just say:

It’s just a silly quirk!

The Cabal

This one’s for Dan at nofacilities.com.  I have used it before but given our recent discussions I thought it appropriate to offer this:

The dishwasher whispered

To the toaster one day

There’s crumbs in my workings

In an irritating way!

 

The toaster responded

With a mouth full of bread

The faults not my own

It’s the humans I said!

 

The kettle then screamed

My ass it’s a glow!

Stop bickering this minute

My lid’s gonna blow!

 

The oven just smiled

A long gentle burn

He knew what was coming

He’d just wait his turn.

 

Then a cold laden breeze

Filled the room with despair

With the fridge door ajar

They knew who was there.

 

“Breakfast is ready”

Came the bone chilling call

And the hoards then descended

On the appliances cabal.

WHO?

 

Who would I be

If I couldn’t be me?

If the she

That’s not me

Would perhaps be a he

Then the me

That you’d see

Wouldn’t be me.

 

I think that the me

this moment you see

is probably a she

cuz a he

That is me

Would probably flee

Now please disagree

if too silly you see.

 

 

So now I’m  a me

That maybe I’d be

If I’m not the me

that I used to be

when looking you’d see

Where would I be

If I couldn’t be me?

Perhaps by the sea.

 

I’d want to be free

And yes by the sea

Beneath a wide tree

with a glass of ice tea

I think that the me

That still is a she

Has feelings of glee

Don’t you agree?

 

What would you do

If you couldn’t be you?

 

 

Shady Quip

If it ain’t broke . . . first hire a consulting firm to determine if it truly is not broken.  Then an environmental agency will need to do a study to assess the ramifications to the environs should changes be required.  Then a societal report will need to be filed in triplicate with various agencies who need to justify their budgets.  And finally if it ain’t broke . . . break it.